I hope you don’t mind, but I just wanted to repost this today. My cousin reminded me of this post and I am so glad she did. Thank you @alridgell
I have written and you have read ALOT of my entries since I started doing this and you have no idea how much I am humbled by it. And while I am proud of every thing I have written here, this post always comes back to me as the time I have been the most real with you. So in honor of my grandfather, who left us this moment 1 year ago today, and, all the other amazing people who are waiting to see me again one day, I repost this from one year ago!
“Today was the day that my family has prepared for as my grandfather said goodbye. He didn’t speak, there was no pain, just one quick deep breath and he was gone from us. As I sat there in room 109 with my family, I realized two things.
First, the opportunity that God has given each of us to love. Yes today was sad and yes today we shed tears for a great man of God. But I got the chance to witness love. I got to see my grandmother say goodbye to her husband of 69 years and tell him it is OK to leave. I got to see a family (my family) grieve together and love together like we have done so many times before.
Also, I realized that life moves on without us sometimes. In one of my moments today at the hospital, I left the confines of room 109. As I walked outside, everything was normal. Doctors and Nurses were going about their business. Patients were healing and dying and for a moment all of their lives where moving on, but mine had stopped. See here is the thing I realized in that moment. Death causes life to stop, for the people left behind. While the world around me was spinning and out of control in so many peoples lives, most of what I held dear in that moment had stopped. Most of what I held dear was contained inside room 109. My family, where ever they were, had stopped everyday life and where focused on the passing of my grandpa. But the rest of the world moved on….
The other thing I realized is it is OK to stop. My life will resume back to a bit of normalcy soon, but it will be a different normal. A normal with out my grandfather HERE with us. But the world is not waiting. As we all gathered inside room 109, a knock at the door brought nurses, and the funeral home ready to take my grandpa away. So we gathered my grandma’s things and left the room and my grandpa.
Room 109 will be cleaned and prepared for a new patient to heal, recover, or die in it. And then to process will start over.
Life will move on…. but for the next few days forgive me if I don’t move with it. I have a Grandfather to celebrate.
****In Loving Memory of Lescine O. Harper****